After a long time I’ve managed my mood to blog again. In this free time there were many things going on in my life. Many things making me feel depressed. Many things making one feel conscious about his/her future, feel bad on the wrong decisions made, feel guilty on doing not wanted things unknowingly, but most importantly feel delighted on how I have managed till here….
Life never goes the way we want it. If it goes, it isn’t life. Many things or should we call hurdles come along the way. Many tears are shred, many seconds are wasted. Not once could someone predict what would happen. All we could do is face it or at max if you are smart enough, be prepared for it. My teachers in college always said to me that I am not intelligent, but smart enough to score good marks. I really never understood that statement. But over the time when you see on what all happens, how dots occurred, you can connect the dots. After all dots can connected seeing backwards.
I basically f*cked up two of my semesters, when I could have taken any courses, by not taking right courses. I delayed few submissions by a period of months. I starved for food, or at least good food. Lived on dimes, lived without phone. More importantly lived through one of unpleasing moments of my life. Like all of your engineering is in front of your eyes, you couldn’t do what you decided to do when you came to college, you hate your discipline, people hate you, you started hating them, you end up being alone, lonely, scared, frightened of being end up as a psycho even after all this.
It doesn’t add up when you just live a life just for surviving in this all chaos. Finding a right meaning to live, not survive, well is difficult. I’ll now stop surviving for others and start living for myself. And try to blog daily. Afterall expressing few things from heart always makes one feel good, or to say amazing.